Marcusmaxmus's Blog

Hi, So I'm trying to work things out emotionally with the breakup. It is going ok, I can function a bit better and work seems to be getting easier. I am trying to get out more and do more, but everywhere I go something reminds me of him. I am trying to move forward and yet still have hope that maybe he will decide it is ok to be with me. There really wasn't anything unworkable wrong with what we had, which is why it hurts so much. I mean it has been about two weeks or rather it was yesterday, and I am still hurting really bad. Most of the time I'm much further in the stage by now. I in now way intend to discredit him, we did everything the right way and it felt really right when I was with him. I know my last post was rather emotional and I am further along in the process and able to talk about it with less emotion although I still feel very very strongly for him. I still have the urge to call him and text him and say I love you to him. I still want to tell him how my day...

greetings, So my life just sucks right now. A week ago last Tuesday N decided to end the relationship. I'm hurting a lot and really on the list side of things. It may have been just 4 months but we had a good thing going. It wasn't purfect and it didn't need to be. There is no antimosity between us, but it does hurt still. It doesn't seem right at all. I'm not really at liberty to say the reasons why on such a public forum out of respect for N. I just want him back and I'm willing to do what needs to be done. I feel as if a part of me is gone. I have never cared about someone in my life as much as I cared about him in that capacity. I know he is hurting too which is the hardest part. I can't and he won't let me be there to make it better. It is going to take a long time for me to even think of another man. Why is it when you care so much it ends up leaving? Unlike previouse men, this one feels soooooo wrong. So very wrong. The rest well they didn...

Greetings!  So first of all let me cuss out my tablet. Grr! I started typing this already and 6 paragraphs in my tablet messes up and I loose everything. I hate typing this on my lappy because it doesn't allow me to be lazy with capitalization and punctuation. Oh well. I will survive. Anyhow, here's the actual post: So it has been a while since I have said anything, another 6 months I would wager. I have again had some more changes in life since I posted last. I know am working full time, I have a wonderful man that I am dating, and I have a few other things to mention. This might be a long post so please have a few minutes or fifteen to read it. :) Let's start with work. On November 25th or so I was selected to be come full time at work. Totally exciting! It meant an increase in bennies, not having to work a second job to survive, and being able to focus on the career I want right now. It is also allowing me to date instead of work 80+ hours a week. I am getting olde...